Category: Acting

Acting Kitchen Marriage SURFing Process

Thinking of removing your implants. Think about this first

One thing To think about before you remove your implants is HOW MUCH do you love yourself. Becasue Boobs are a buffer…they shield you from your own hate and make you into a pretense….so if you remove them..your shields are down and you have to face everything straight on…you can’t push your chest out and deflect the negativity or perhaps they absorb it for us….from us and to us…and like anything FAKE….it deflects and the reality of our world or our natural state is distorted to the point that the distortion becomes the reality.
sooooooo to be clear…best get your LOVE on before you take those out because I spent four years rebuilding my LIFE before I removed them and I still was Brough to my knees at the lack of POWER I had without them…but be truthful power built on falseness is not power at all but a delusion and thus the crumbling of a delusion is what Brought me to my knee but once I rose up..I have hand rails to grab..an acting career to reenter…a marriage to strengthen…and children and loving kind friends to support me…

I set the stage for my entrance and when I finally reentered…I was not alone or living a lie..I was my original self with more scars…

so just prep your emotional life before you do it.

a few questions..

Why did you get them
Does that reason still exist
Are you ok with no having big boobs because socially they are a commodity
are you ok with letting go of a version of yourself
Are you ok with recasting yourself into the tiny tiny committee.
Are you OK?

Then just shower yourself in Kindness and find loving hands to do the procedures and take your time and peel the ROLE off…slowly and lovingly as if you do it with a quick hand…as many of these doctors suggest…you will have missed the mourning process and it is in that that you set yourself free.

Acting

How I got out of character

Getting out of character.

I am an actor and part of how I work is taking on other people’s thought, movements and beliefs. It is a fascinating dive into the empathy realm and the playing with the line of reality. What s reality. What is YOUR reality and what is their’s and sometimes that line bleeds…if you are lucky, if I am lucky I am so believing in my role that even I don’t know where susie starts and this new role ends.

It is the ultimate necessity to be an actor. To have the fearlessness to release yourself and that is what it is all about. Being able to walk up those never ending stairs movement by movement or belief by belief or word by word or action by action into another dimension.

This is the scariest thing mostly because you now somewhere in this journey you are sacrificing parts of your own self and like a diver..how long can you be under water without suffering from vertigo or whatever it is called where you can’t remember which way is up?

Acting…FOR ME….is like that…I get lost…usurped by the role and disappear…I keep a shell of myself and my world and my family and kids and husband represent that but more than that and the entry is harder…so I shed a lot…I let go of comipments and relationships and I disappear…

Maybe not to the naked eye but to any would seeker or evenly worker they’ll see..I am slipping…

One day after I had returned to acting after raising my young children into semi functioning children I was heading home and I remember as I opened the front door….Oh, Yeah…my kids.

It struck me as funny but the idea that I can release my motherhood role was fascinating.. and to do it to such a point that I had to actively remember it…well.it was all a bit MENTAL to say the least.

Then one day after playing a very lovely part who loved to cook but not into sex so much…my husband asked..When in Susie coming home?

IT made me stop chopping my scallions and look up. “Excuse me” I said or she said…who knows…

Steve repeated the question and it slowly sank in….HE KNOWS…he knows I am not quite myself …even in my own kitchen…

I smiled and said…”don’t you like her…she loves to cook…”

She is fine but I miss Susie he said and in that moment the veil of delete that I am perhaps many actors live with was revealed…I was missing…

Give your heart to someone…even another version of your self and it can be tricky to find the door to unbolt and retrieve yourself..

Unless you build a very clear path back to it…to her…. And that is what I have been working on.

Finding first who SUSIE is and then venturing off and trying to return sans too much collateral damage.

What I am about to share with you look me years to articulate but recently I was speaking at the Miami Beach chamber of commerce to their health and wellness committee and they received it…they didn’t;t run to take my class because the idea is still touchy but they got it and I felt in that room…they felt the idea flicker in their mind…

What if THEY TOO were still in character and if they were…what role was it and what would they be without it…

I

Acting

Hello …Creative Shelter co.

I have wanted a company- this idea of a company since I was standing in a white wooden acting studio ( ah there it is- my image of peace) being asked by one of my teachers where i see myself at 40. I opened my mouth and said I am going to have a company but not a normal acting company.

I had no idea what this meant or who it was within me that said it. I literally shrugged my shoulders in acceptances and looked around the room as everyone nodded. Ok..and it is written..Funny how these truths escape if we just OPEN our mouth.

A company? It was 1995- there was NO cell phone and NO Social Media…there WAS however AOL and a Chat room and emails and I was recently using those to stay connected to Steve while I studied in London.

Webber DOuglass was a house made into a school and I suppose that’s what i am seeking…here in Miami…and why the warmth of a home is always missing when I search for a SPACE…

By I digrace.

I was recently texted by one of my students turned past student turned friend turned ….practice partner turned as i sat across from her yesterday….

My first company member?

She doesn’t know this officially yet and I assume the other girl next to her will be as well- she is just 6 months out of my clasS- A KIND SOUL NEEDS TO SOLIDIFY…

They both texted me and we sat from 11-3:30 talking about how to move forward in our lives with grace

You wouldn’t think this is an “A. Ha” moement but having tried to teach and explain this to dozens of other artists not many have fully bought into moving from forgiveness..NONE actually ….they choose to hold onto their STORY and in that the Pain of the MAternal and in that I am a punching bag…as I am THE MATERNAL….i have learned…

It is exhausting and painful but I am there to show the benefits. A woman- a creative- owning her fault lines and taking responsibility…they have a roadmap if they want it…does and don’t s

And as we sat there I have to remind myself these woman are 20 plus years younger then me…both of them have proven in thier way of living…that they are more interested in killing their ego and moving from love more than anything else…

They are not saints…nor am I …we are powerful Alpha WOman with the ability to destroy…but I have informed them what that looks like over a life time and I give them thoughts on how to avoid holding on to anger too long…

THey ask me to the coffe juice shop and as I sit there and TEACH…I instantly see what I have..the daughters I never did, the company I will eventually build and a philosophy that these two women find valuable in their lives.

I am the Artistic DIrector of The Creative Shelter. We practice the S.U.R.F. Acting method and we wil be appearing throughout MIami this year and launching officially in Edinburgh in August 2019- We share stories of HOW TO LOVE along the maternal fault line…

Acting

Is your ACTING technique harming you?

If you use your painful experiences to help you tap into emotion in your work you are re triggering your past experiences and will have to contend with that trauma after the play/film is done.

If you allow yourself to fully feel the trauma of your character you will also need to deal with that residue after the play is over

If you are aware of your ability to absorb try and get out of character often- in between scenes and when the play is finished each night and when the play closed- take time to RECOVER…maybe you will have less emotional traumas than most.

And a long and lovely career as well as home life.

I also suggest consider NOT marrying an actor. Actos by natural are transient and one in a relationship is quite enough.